Why do we Self Sabotage?

The definition of self-sabotage is when a behaviour creates problems in out lives and interferes with long standing goals.

So let’s take a look at this in terms of weight loss. Self-sabotaging behaviours may include, overconsuming calories in terms of eating extra comfort foods after a long day at work, option for take out instead of cooking and preparing your own meals etc. It may also include skipping out on training or not giving yourself enough time for recovery after gym sessions.

So if we know these behaviours aren’t driving us towards your goal, why do we do them?

When it comes to weight loss we usually see the following two with our clients:

1. They self sabotage because they aren’t enjoying the foods they eat and have restricted their diet

2. The stories we tell ourselves on what we deserve and why we can’t have the things we want.

Once we can identify the reason why we self sabotage, the closer we are to being able to prevent self sabotage.

Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable

Don’t get me wrong, we all love being comfortable. There’s no pressure when we are comfortable and we know we are guaranteed to enjoy the experience when we are comfortable.

Unfortunately, change does not happen when we are comfortable.

Change can only occur when we change what we are doing and changing what we are doing is uncomfortable because it is something unknown and something we are not used to doing.

However, if change is required to reach your goal and being uncomfortable is inevitable how can we stay committed?

In my Opinion there are 2 steps:

  1. Get super clear and set goals that are achievable and something that gets you excited and ready for change, something that is worth being uncomfortable for.
  2. Trial and test different exercise methods, recovery modalities, ways of eating etc. and see what works for you. The goal here is to find something enjoyable.

Being uncomfortable is temporary and that’s the number 1 thing I want you to think about when making a change. you have to weigh up, does the pleasure of your goal outweigh the temporary experience of being uncomfortable?

photo of a woman hugging a blue pillow
Photo by bruce mars on Pexels.com

Intrinsic versus Extrinsic Motivation

To Understand the differences between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation, we must first understand what each of them actually are:

Intrinsic Motivation: Intrinsic motivation comes from within. Our feelings and our desires are what drives us t achieve something.

Extrinsic Motivation: Extrinsic Motivation comes from outside sources, generally in the form of someone else holding us accountable.

Now neither of these sources of motivation are wrong per say, however we do find Intrinsic motivation will be more sustainable long term compared to Extrinsic motivation.

Saying this though, it is important to understand that for a lot of people, particularly when it comes to achieving health and fitness goals, such as weight loss for example, that we begin with Extrinsic Motivation. This is where a good coach is highly beneficial to allow you to discover what it is you enjoy doing, what you desire and how that will make you feel. In essence you learn how to understand and intrinsically motivate yourself by utilising Extrinsic Motivators to begin with.

balance business cobblestone conceptual
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Congruent: What is it and why is it important?

The definition of Congruent is to be in agreement or harmony. This is vital in health and fitness especially if you want to achieve your end goal or your point B.

The most important aspect of any sort of goal setting is to make sure you are able to achieve congruency with what you set out to achieve. Chances are if you are seeing a lack of results or aren’t achieving the exact goal you set out to achieve, you are not being congruent.

For Example, someone who wants to lose weight puts time aside for exercising, preparing their meals that serve them as well as identifying and changing habits which does not align with what they want to achieve. This is being congruent.

Not being congruent would look like, choosing to watch Netflix instead of exercising, relying on supplements and restricting your diet to the point of being unenjoyable and unsustainable as well as not changing the habits that are keeping you stuck.

If you find yourself telling yourself that it is impossible to achieve what you want to achieve, whether it be weight loss, increase performance in your chosen sport or increase in strength, then it may be because you are not being congruent with those goals.

woman measuring her waist
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

Don’t Be Fooled, There are No Must Do Exercises In The Gym

In todays blog I want to address the common misconception that there are certain exercises we must do in the gym in order to get fit and strong (unless you are a powerlifter or a weightlifter this is just simply not true). Exercises such as back squats, bench press, Deadlift and overhead press are our biggest bang for your buck type movements, but if you cannot safely undertake the exercise there is no need to do them.

An example would be someone who has lower back issues and this is aggravated while undertaking a back squat and they struggle to get into the correct position for the lift then we need to look at alternatives to the back squat. A heavy sled drag for example with the harness over the shoulders, is a perfect alternative allowing us to load up the body and work the same muscle groups as the back squat while also removing the load through the lower back.

We can also lower the harness and place it around the waist, this places a higher demand on the posterior chain which is similar to that of the deadlift while also removing the load from the lower back.

In other words, there are many ways to skin a cat and if you are finding some exercises just don’t work for you, or you don’t enjoy them, then change them. Look for alternative methods to reach the same result.

man pushing cart with weight plates
Photo by Leon Martinez on Pexels.com

Choosing what works best for you is the crucial decision in choosing your diet

Diets are a constant topic in the fitness industry nowadays. What diet is best for fat loss is an argument which is all too common. If you didn’t see our post yesterday you can check it out below and what I want to lead on from that is the number one focus you should have when choosing a diet.

Straight off the bat i’d like to straighten out one point, in terms of weight loss, it does not matter what diet you choose, they all put you into a calorie deficit if you stick to them.

Therefore, in terms of weight loss, the only decision you need to make and decide on is which diet suits your lifestyle.


Because the number 1 indicator of achieving your fitness goals is adherence. So when deciding on which diet is best for you, you need to look at 3 aspects.

  1.  How do you like to eat?
  2.  What foods do you enjoy eating?
  3.  Which diet suits your lifestyle?

In my opinion, the third one is the most important, because if you choose a diet which is hard to stick to due to your lifestyle, this will actually cause an increase in stress levels and put more strain on the body which will eventually lead to you collapsing on your diet.


Motivation: What is it and How do we get it

When it comes to improving your health, whether it be going to the gym, running, eating well, getting in the right amount of recovery etc. motivation seems to come up regularly as a stumbling block.

In my experience, this comes down to that motivation is viewed as almost like a phenomenon in which some people just have it and other people have to be pushed and have someone else keep them accountable.

I believe this view needs to be changed.

The definition of motivation is: A reason or reasons for acting in a particular way.

That’s it, literally everyone who wants to make a change to their health and wellbeing has motivation.

The belief I have is that people do not struggle with motivation, it’s that people struggle with understanding what their why is, why do they need to exercise, why do they need to eat a certain way and the feeling of having achieved the goals they set out for themselves.

So if you are struggling with motivation, reconnect with exactly why you are doing the things you are doing, what is the outcome you want and what feeling is connected with achieving that outcome.

woman measuring her waist
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com


If you want something different, you need to do things differently.

It’s one of the easiest sounding statements, but one of the hardest to execute. Even once you begin to change the way you do things, it can still remain quite challenging.

Experiencing this myself has opened my eyes to how rewarding going after what you want and making that change can be. 3-4 months ago I decided I needed to pick my life up and move from Gippsland to the sunny shores of South East Queensland, to further my career as a coach and live the lifestyle that I wanted to live.

This was a difficult period as it involved closing down our gym which we had been working on for 18 months, being away from the love and support of my girlfriend for a short period of time and having the challenge of starting a new job as well as finding a house to live in. To say the stress levels rose was an understatement.

However the biggest reward of this experience is everything I do from now on is aligned with the life I want to lead, with the people I want to live it with. This is why, when we coach clients, we dive deep into understanding exactly what they want, the outcomes they want to have. Once we have this deep level of understanding we can help them remove the blocks and allow them to also make the hard decision of making changes to allow them to have the things they say they want to have because then they can take the actions that are on line with what they want to have.

Once you reach this level where you are moving forward towards living the life you want with the people that you care and want to enjoy life with.

3 Weight loss tips to get you started today

Information around weight loss today can get quite confusing wherever you look whether it be the internet, the newspaper or magazines. That’s why today I want to put out three simple tips for anyone to follow if they are wanting to lose some excess weight.

1. Do Exercise that you enjoy

One of the most common things people look for is what exercise/s are going to make me lose the most weight quickly. Unfortunately this is very much a low road approach and can lead to unsustainable approaches which don’t last in the long term. The key for weight loss is to be consistent with your exercise, this means doing the exercises you enjoy.

2. The choice of diet does not matter as long as it fits your lifestyle

At the end of the day every single diet you see for weight loss comes down to one simple aspect, put less calories in then what you are burning. Therefore if you do want to choose a diet which suits you because you are a person who needs a plan to follow, then choose one that fits your lifestyle. For example, if you are someone who does not like to eat a lot of food in the morning and finds it hard to do so, intermittent fasting might work really well for you.

3. Understand the stories you are telling yourself

The number 1 hardest thing to overcome while trying to lose weight is yourself. our habits are our number 1 downfall and the stories that we tell ourselves to make ourselves feel better when we undertake those habits are also holding us back. That’s why we need to go deep into understanding why we do what we do. A lot of the time it can be to do with stress and pleasure, as in we use food as a type of reward to give ourselves gratification. Whatever it may be you need to get down to the root of the cause before you can start to understand and break down your habits.

woman measuring her waist
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com


Are you Self-Sabotaging?

We all want the best for our lives, to have good jobs, be fit and healthy and most importantly be happy.

But when we look at health and fitness, so many people are not happy with what they have and then can never seem to reach that goal no matter how many different professionals, diets etc. they try.

If you are one of these people, I want to ask you one question, are you self sabotaging your own health and happiness because it all seems to hard? or is it more comfortable to play the victim?

We generally see self sabotaging occur as soon as people begin to move in the direction and begin to see the results that they want to see. This sabotage can come in many shapes and forms, not setting your training/diet/recovery as much of a priority anymore, putting others first before yourself and even stopping trying to achieve your health and fitness goal all together.

If you find yourself doing any of the above sabotaging behaviours, then I want you to do one thing: Reconnect with why you want to be fitter and healthier and really delve deep into the feeling you will have from achieving this goal. If after this you still do not see yourself as the priority then maybe you need to reconsider your goal and the importance of it to you.

woman girl silhouette jogger
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com